Thursday, April 28, 2011

Don’t wait for a "Death Bed Moment" to Say “I’m Sorry.” You May Never Get That Opportunity!


     One of the most tragic events anyone can experience is the unexpected death of a friend or loved one. When this happens, grief sets in immediately and most people often will say, “I just wished I would have had the opportunity to speak with him just one last time.”

      It’s a different situation when a loved one is on their death bed and you have the opportunity to visit them in a hospital, be by their side, maybe for days and even hours before they succumb. But not so when they are taken away from us within a matter of seconds, when we least expect it.
     “Oh, Johnny will live forever, and Mary will too!” I’ll call them up next week. I’m too busy with my life right now!” 
     Then suddenly, your phone rings and you are given the bad news!
     “Oh no, Dear God, No! Please Dear God, No!”

     What would you say to someone if you were alone with them and knew for certain they would be dead in 5 minutes? Think about it! Would you tell them how much you loved them? How much they meant to you all of these years? Would you ask them to forgive you for any negative things that may have happened between you, such as mean or indifferent attitudes you may have had towards them; regrets you may have for not always responding to their needs, for neglecting them, or for any other events between them such as lying to them, talking about them behind their back, and even harboring resentment for one reason or another.
     I’m certain that there are many people in this world with whom we have had negative experiences with, many grave ones, some minor; but wish we would have had a chance to make amends before they left us. Cleaning the slate is crucial for many; this is why the 9th step of Alcoholics Anonymous - Make direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others - is extremely important for the healing process to ensue between people.
     Unfortunately, unexpected deaths deny us of this privilege and opportunity. This is why it is crucial to your heart and soul to do it now, while they are still alive.
     Many have heard the expression that “confession is good for the soul” never realizing the deep power of healing that act has, not only on the confessor, but to the one being confessed, too! Far too often we go through life harboring guilt or resentment towards another person never realizing it can probably be more harmful to ourselves. Quite often, after confessing your feelings to another person it can actually open up their heart, they never realizing you had these feelings, thereby affording them the opportunity to express their own sorrow and fulfill their need to receive forgiveness as well.
     It also works the other way too when we express our deep admiration and respect to the departing loved one, as we give praise for the contribution they have made in your life, not only to you, but to those who they came in contact with.
     It is so sad in this day and age when we are so consumed with our own lives that we fail to take a few moments from our busy schedule to let those folks know exactly how you actually feel about them. Now, that we have cell phones, instant messaging, emails and texting, there is no excuse for not reaching out to others; it’s never too late to express your love, affection and appreciation, and especially for saying, I'm Sorry to a person who may be taken out of your life within a matter of seconds. How would you feel then? Think about it!
O to see your face, again, 
just one more time, 
to see that twinkle in your eye, 
regardless of our past mistakes, 
to hear you say it one more time,
 “I always Loved you, 
when we said Good Bye 
~

For more information about the author’s books, The End Times Passover and Why Christians Will Suffer Great Tribulation, and to access his web sites and blogs, please click on Joe Ortiz.

2 comments:

  1. What a tender, compassionate, and thought-provoking message that we all need today! We never can know how long any of us have on this earth to be what God wants us to be - and the great needs all around us should drive us to be like the One who gave his all, the Lord Jesus Christ. Thanks for giving us these words.
    Patricia

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  2. My dear friend: I have been reading your blogs and other writings for quite some time and I am convinced that your middle name has to be either "love" or "tenderness" or "compassion" or any other word that would mean what these words mean. If everyone on earth looked at things the way you do, no one would ever have to think about hate laws, or wars, or prisons, etc. etc. Please keep sharing with us, your readers, and my prayer is that the Lord will keep blessing your efforts!
    Thankfully in the One, Adriana

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